When Joy Becomes More than a Crumb

Photo by Gabrielle Clark

Today my body bought me a long forgotten memory.
A joyful one!

As I was out walking early in the morning, a little yellow flower caught my eye.

“Do you like butter?”

Instantly, I could hear the sound of little girls giggling with delight as we played this childhood game. It was a simple game we played where you hold a flower under your friend’s chin and if it turns yellow – then you like butter!

It made me smile – and still does – to feel this body memory from long ago.

A forgotten joy.

The joy that is the precious jewel of childhood that no one can take from me. Even a difficult childhood doesn’t stop the timeless innocence, wonder, and magic that each child has available in his or her inner world. A wellspring of wonder.

Rilke says even if you found yourself in the worst prison you would still have it. The magic, wonder, and joy that is inherent in every child.

To savour an ice-cream slowly, trying to catch the drips with my tongue, without an ounce of guilt, enjoying the flavors and taste sensations of fresh passion fruit or feijoa straight off the vine. The total immersion of my whole being when listening to a favourite fairy tale, a song or a story over and over again. The joy and delight of jumping waves at the ocean and running screaming from the water with pure free abandonment. The magic of a mirror and wondering how to get into the world on the other side where the little girl is……

Somewhere along the way, I had let my joy become a crumb.
It is so nice to taste it again.

To feel once again the wonderment and joy the world offers to me when I can pause and listen to my body wisdom.

To nurture the seeds of wonder and joy that live inside me – this is my practice.

My inspiration from Rainer Maria Rilke…

“And even if you found yourself in some prison, whose walls let in none of the world’s sounds – wouldn’t you still have your childhood, that jewel beyond all price, that treasure house of memories?”

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Author: Gabrielle Clark

I am a Somatic Therapist and Initiatic Art Therapist and a Mum and a wife and a student of philosophy. I love to be inspired by people who speak from their own experiencing. I found Gene Gendlins work through a love of Carl Rogers teachings. Now I am here. I work in person and online with individuals who reach out to me, there is more about me and my work on here..... www.manawacounselling.com

4 thoughts on “When Joy Becomes More than a Crumb”

  1. That feels so good…just to hear you share the memories of your childhood and how they are still there and will always be there as a resource for your life right now! What a treasure that can’t be taken from you. Or me! I too can remember those childhood moments, and if I allow them space to be felt again, I can feel my whole being expand with that sense of joy and curiosity and hope, once more!. Thank you. Kevin

  2. If I allow them space to be felt again….. I like this Kevin, and I like that they can just come like that – if there is space. Walking out in the morning over the beautiful hills with not a care hanging over me I guess there was room inside for them to awaken.

    It is so easy and so familiar to fall over to the side of the heaviness and the troubles, so to invite and make space for joy curiosity and hope once more, yes to that!

    Thank you for sharing,


  3. Do you like butter? such a simple phrase Gabe!! And so many images released by those words!! Now every yellow flower that I see will bring back those images. Thank you!!

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