Photo Credit: Bill Lazar
It’s different from worried or concerned. And letting it be there without story or explanation or searching for meaning… lets there be an opening within.
… a releasing around my aorta. Then a further releasing…, a lengthening and unwinding on my left back.
A sort of uncurling. And a filling in.
It’s quite specific, this uncurling. It is uncurling rather than unwinding. The words are right even if they don’t seem to fit the usual meaning of each word.
There’s a new openness in me. An opening-ness that’s continuing, in a settling-in way.
And surprisingly… a quiet pride. And a comfort that goes along with it.
Yes, the QUIET of it. The QUIET of being touched by the NAKED TRUTH of… frightened.
……….<a deep sigh releases itSelf>
And I feel even more… a settling in to comfort. Into mySelf.
Into the ironic safety of knowing that I’m frightened.
3 thoughts on “Finding the rightness of the FRIGHTENED in me”
Oh Lynn, this is delicious!! that clarity of it not being unwinding, but uncurling – I can see it and feel it. The Pride, the owning of that awareness, the comfort in owning…. and finally the Quiet of of of being touched by the NAKED TRUTH of… frightened.
This is old, takes me back somehow to preverbal me who knew frightened but the only way to cope was to push it away, to distract… now the ironic safety of knowing that I’m frightened.
What I realise is that when I was little, this sense of frightened was all of me. I was the sense of being frightened. I have carried this with me until I found Alexander Technique and a new awareness of my body. Now with Wholebody Focusing I can be the observer of the sense of frightened in my body and I can hold both. Frightened like all the other emotions no longer overwhelms me. I can be in presence and observing the emotion. Gratitude!!
Like Kit, I too, like these words:
“….Into the ironic safety of knowing that I’m frightened…”
And it’s so counter-intuitive that our just recognizing and directly sensing something awful that we’ve been avoiding for so long, can bring a sense of peace, and relief….
How odd, and yet, how true…